Hell is a Wedding Seating Plan

So…if you follow me on twitter you would have seen this tweet earlier this week….

How to seat divorced parents of the bride/groomWhilst I am sure that many brides baulk at the thought of deciding who sits where… you want to make sure Aunt Agnes, who likes the odd bottle of whiskey, is sat the furthest distance from the bar, you want the ones with babies in ‘whisking out’ distance and you want your lecherous Uncle Rob to be as far away from the bridesmaids as possible….right?

I agree it is a task that is not undertaken lightly by any bride… but the bride of divorcee parents? With a groom of divorcee parents? What the hell did I sign up for?

As you may guess, we are not having a traditional top table, whilst I am sure our parents will be on their best behaviour on our big day (they all know me well enough to not want me in bridezilla mode bearing down on them in my big white frock), I didn’t want all our parents partners to be sat alone.

I had thought of every combination possible, but with 7 parents between us (and I also have divorced grandparents – fingers crossed for me you guys!), I have decided to shirk tradition and we are going to sit on our ruddy own.

A sweetheart table…genius! It also means we get a little break from the mingling and having to talk to everyone. We can focus on just us two and make sure that we eat something.

Mr & Mrs Mousie 2Totally having these on our cheese ‘cake’ – £10 a pair

I spent hours juggling people around the other tables…trying to find the right mix… and finally I decided to get each set of parents to ‘host’ their own table. Easy right? Why did it take me 2 hours to work it out?!

Also, just a little tip guys…use Excel and not a piece of paper… copy and pasting names is so much easier than scribbling them out for the 25th time and rewriting it somewhere else… I nearly got RSI.

Our friends tables were a little easier…all our friends are nice (hence why we like them) so they pretty much could be slapped down in any formation and it would be great.

Future brides, when you come to this task, sit down with your RSVP list (you should be marking down who is coming off your invited list – You’re not?! What kind of crazy ass system have you got going on?), a MASSIVE cup of tea, some snacks (you will be here a while) and your groom. Don’t let them get away without this sort of hell in their lives…also you may not know about the feud his dad and his sister had years ago that leaks out over dinners occasionally….

Mine is now pretty much sorted after a bride and groom heads-together-for-3- hours-plus-tea session, with those in red pen who are yet to RSVP (I am coming for you!) but with people ready to slot into the table gaps if needs be.

And if anyone complains about where they are sitting…… hell hath no fury like a bride…



13 responses to “Hell is a Wedding Seating Plan

  1. Glad you managed to come up with solutions – table for two sounds like a brilliant idea!

  2. Well done on cracking it. I think we went through at least 10 possible iterations before settling on a seating plan we were happy with – I had every name on a little card and we shuffled them about for hours!

  3. Sitting on your own is the perfect solution! I have divorced parents and it is only recently (9 years after they broke up) that they can talk and be in the same room at the same time. I find it all very odd and annoying. My Dad likes to call my Mum ‘the witch’ and gives the grandkids £1 if they also call her it! He is very naughty.

    I hope you manage to stay calm and have fun with the last months of planning!


  4. There is an easier way, don’t invite the family, only invite the friends and all sit round one table.

  5. Seating plans are a nightmare! We ended up not bothering in the end – apart from out top table where each seat was named.

    We had an informal buffet for our reception in a local village hall and when we arrived everyone had managed to arrange themselves into where they wanted to sit anyway! 🙂

    I love your sweetheart table idea! The actual day will whizz fly by so quickly you won’t realise it’s over so that’s a great idea to have some time together on your own table! 🙂 x

  6. I got married 21 years ago and still hear about why I shouldn’t have sat my husband’s aunt on that table…sigh

  7. It seems you did the best job sorting out these tables. The bride and groom have their own table = genius. Each set of parents to host a table = genius +1. All our parents and some of grandparents are divorced too and we found it tricky when the photographer didn’t seem to get it. Like insisted on getting couple pictures with ex couples.

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